So, Cowboy’s birthday is Monday. I’m making him cioppino for the family. I guess we’ll have ten or twelve people there. We’ve only got a table for eight. Now, in the past, I would have totally freaked out about this, but he’s been a relaxing influence on me.

His aunt and uncle are bringing their card table. My boss gave me one of his turkey fryers, so I can cook it outside without stinking up the place. I had wanted to get pasta bowls to serve it in, but I’m a little broke lately, so smaller soup bowls are going to have to do.

I figure, if his aunt can have a good 30 people over for Christmas in a house that’s no bigger than ours, I can do this. I like this family. They don’t stress me out. The last set of inlaws made such a damn big deal over everything that I hated to be around even the ones I could tolerate in theory. These people are nice, and they like me, and I like them. Makes a big difference.

I think I’m losing some of the perfectionism too. I can just get it done and enjoy myself. There isn’t going to be anything fancy about this, just cioppino, good French bread, and maybe salad. I’ll make Marci’s cheesy bread thing for people to snack on. Everyone likes that. No going overboard this time. This way, I’ll have fun too.

When I broached the subject with the Cowboy, he said that he’d never had a birthday party before. My god, and he was married for how many years? That’s just kind of sad.

I’ll be going to Costco after work, because I have to over-prepare a little, or it’s just not me. Maybe they’ll have their seafood deal, and I can get some of it cheaper. We need wine and beer anyway, and they sometimes have good bread. Who knows, maybe I’ll find my pasta bowls there.

In other news, it’s Friday! So I get to see my squeeze, as the kids are off to their Dad’s. Cowboy’s pouring concrete today, which usually lets him off before dark, so he might beat me home. It’s scheduled to rain Saturday night too, so I might get an actual day off with him Sunday. If we schlep around watching football all day, that would be OK. I’ll bring something to read, and we’ll make pigs of ourselves.

Time to dive right in, I guess.

I didn’t think I’d have time to update today (and what a way to get a journal started!) but my contractor kickoff meeting this afternoon was postponed, which means I have time to do it at work. After work on Thursday nights is really a zoo; I have to get the kids all ready to go to their Dad’s Friday, and myself to go to Cowboy’s. The kids and Cowboy share custody of me, switching every other week. So I’ve got to get all of our laundry done and me packed in addition to the usual nonsense. Although it’s not like I wouldn’t have time to write at work. I’m not the busiest here lately.

Took John to the orthodontist this morning. This is the first time I’ve met this doctor, and he seems really together. He showed me all the stuff on a neat computer program. I guess last time John was in there; he took digital photos of his mouth as well as X-rays. Poor kid’s mouth is so small that all of his permanent molars are coming in all jumbled up.

So John’s first getting something called a palate expander. It hooks to his top teeth, and we turn a screw every day. Doesn’t look too painful, but he’s going to have to be better at brushing his teeth. Heck, we all need to be better about brushing them at night.

After that, he gets some doohickey that will push his lower molars back to make room, and some braces and headgear that pull his upper front teeth back. He’s going to have an uncomfortable year, but it’s a better solution than the pulling teeth that I went through.

The orthodontist has apparently dealt with divorced parents for years, and will make sure that I get all the information. I’m glad somebody will. I didn’t even know that he had something put in his mouth last time until he asked me if he could eat popcorn. Lovely.

OK, here’s the thing. I’ve been reading online diaries, blogs, journals, and whatnot for a couple of years, and for the last year or so, a thought has been tickling the back of my head. Why can’t I do this? I’m competent at the writing, I think. At least, I can write comprehensible technical documents, and I even make the effort to keep those from drying up and blowing away. So I’m going to lay out some of my concerns and doubts right off the bat, and hope that every once in a while I can remember to come back to the first page and refresh my memory.

What do I want to do with it?

- Well, for one, I guess I’d like to use this thing as a creative outlet. I’m sure my friends don’t always want to hear me dumping on them about the same old things, and for now this can be my outlet for that.- I’d like to keep it clean and coherent enough to use it to keep in touch with my moving-to-Colorado sister. Not so clean that I want Mom or Dad to stumble across it though. That would border on the boring. My life’s not all that exciting that it can hold up to that kind of censorship and still be readable.  

- I’d like to document this road I’m traveling down with the Cowboy. We do some really interesting things, things that I always wanted to do. Now that I finally am, I’d like to be able to remember how I felt about them. This is going to involve a lot of names and places that I may or may not change.

What do I want to stay away from?

- I’d like to not be totally boring. This is my life, after all, and I don’t think it’s boring. If it comes across as that then I may have to take a cold hard look at my writing style.- I’m torn about the pseudonyms and anonymity. I think I’d like my sister and my best friend to be able to look at this site, but I’m not sure. I can’t remember the last time I even thought badly about either of them, but what if something’s misinterpreted? Do I want to risk that unpleasantness?  

- I have no doubt that a lot of my opinions, politics, and hobbies are not going to jive with a lot of people. There just aren’t a whole lot of rednecks on the internet, and I know damn well that I’m going to be in the minority here. I’d like to not let that bother me. It doesn’t bother me in real life; I just go on living my life, so I’m not exactly sure why it would here.

- And lastly, I’m completely new to this HTML junk. I’d like to not fuck it up too badly. I’m not crossing my fingers on that one.

And with that, here goes. Maybe it will be interesting. Maybe not. I’ll figure that out as I go along.