Out on a limb
August 27th, 2004 by
cowgirljules
I’m feeling just a wee bit nervous right now.
You see, I’ve kept this journal quiet from all but my closest friends, and two of those three don’t ever use the internet. So I’ve been writing for strangers, for the most part, which is easier. I like the anonymity; if someone doesn’t like what I say or my writing style, they’re free to stop clicking on me. Won’t hurt my feelings a bit.
But I’ve been thinking about sharing this link with another of my longtime friends. He could have stumbled on it anyway, and I’d rather give it to him up front. I cleaned my archives up a little, because you don’t want friends coming around with dishes in the sink. Mostly, I just locked down a couple of uncomplimentary entries regarding other people in our social circle. I didn’t want those ones googled anyway, but I also don’t want to erase them, as they do truly reflect what I was feeling at the time.
I don’t doubt that I’ll be doing a little self-censoring for a while. This is someone whose opinion matters to me. Instead of pissing off some random stranger, I could alienate one of my very favorite friends. I hope not though, and I haven’t written anything to wad his shorts before. And this is someone that I’ve shared major life events with, so there really isn’t a need to feel so self-conscious. I do feel that though. It’s like standing before someone you’ve always seen in topcoat and tails, and whipping off all of your clothes. Except *ahem*, that analogy doesn’t quite work, after those topless days at the lake, now does it, Big Jeff?
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