For my Dad’s birthday, which was the Friday we left, I had wanted to go out with him on a fishing cruise and take all of the boys. But fishing was pretty expensive and the only sponsored trips were on days that we already had reservations for other things. Dad did not want to take four boys out on some random boat that I picked up at the dock, so instead we brought Mom and Dad on our extremely touristy-sounding Pirate Ship Snorkeling Adventure.

But as hokey as that could have been, it wasn’t. It was an old wooden ship, and sure, the sailors were all dressed up as pirates, but they were really great. The ship was only about half full, and they motored us out of the harbor and past the edge of the bay (where I discovered that I didn’t take nearly enough pictures, as was the theme of the whole trip for me.) They took us out past the arches and hoisted the sails and turned off the motor. Sailing was so nice and peaceful that I could have done it all day, and was why I’d forgotten that I even had the camera. I was too wrapped up in actually enjoying myself to remember to document it, which is really a switch for me.

After we sailed around and watched some whales in the distance, the captain took us back into the bay to do some snorkeling. The swimmers in the family suited up first, and I held back with Seamus. John and O were buddies and took off together while I hoped they would please wait for Aunt Bonnie.

Finally, Seamus and I went in the water. I’m not all that much of a swimmer though, and I got a mouthful of seawater. Between that and having a frightened kids clinging to me, I decided that snorkeling in the deep wasn’t all that much fun and I decided that we should go in before my incipient panicking brought on an asthma attack. Fortunately, these pirates were the rum punch variety, so I was quite happy to stay on board and partake with my mom and No, who came in when he saw me coming in.

So poor Aunt Bonnie not only had her own Phoebs clinging to her like a limpet, but the two older boys following her in to the beach. Uncle Rob and my dad (the best swimmers of the family) had gone off in a different and more challenging direction.

I lurked by the plank and took pictures of everyone coming in. Of course, that’s not the most flattering angle, what with the mask and the flapping swim fins, so most of the pictures aren’t exactly fit to print. I could, but I’d be keelhauled even if they had to fly me back to Mexico to find a ship willing to do it.

Here’s O coming in though, and he looks like he had fun.

And I got what I think is the happiest picture of my Dad that I’ve ever taken:

Sadly, the boat ride was over way too soon, but we all learned a lesson on “Embrace the Corny” that day. And also that rum punch is very good.

After we hit the dock, the family dynamics started to shake down into their natural orders. We stood at the end and debated which way to go. Dad had had enough family togetherness and went back to the ship for some peace, and the rest of us were hungry. Since Bonnie and Mom are just a little decision-impaired, they were perfectly content to follow Rob and I, who are very good at making decisions. Unfortunately, this was where Rob learned that while I’m good at the snap decision, they aren’t always right, so we walked up into a kind of shady neighborhood before we figured out that we should have turned around.

Finally though, we got going down to the tourist section where we belonged, and Rob and I agreed that the first restaurant that we saw looked just fine. Then we all had to have the family discussion over whether or not it was safe to drink the ice with the sodas (I lived dangerously, but really, who wants to deal with a kid with Montezuma’s Revenge on vacation? Turns out that we were all fine for the whole trip.)

And the street vendors, my god! You couldn’t get a bite in your mouth without some little kid blowing a whistle in your ear or asking if you wanted a bobble-head turtle! I had predetermined that I wanted a piece of silver though, and negotiated a vendor for a nice coral bracelet. The family laughed at me because I’m the most hard-assed of the bunch and here I was buying the first thing. Well, the second if you count the picture of the iguana in a sombrero on O’s head.

Lunch was great. Pheobs declared that my shrimp burrito contained “krill” and that she wanted no part of it. A little too many nature videos, anyone? But she did have a bite of my shrimp and actually liked it, so I teased her about her krill for the rest of the trip.

After lunch was shopping, and getting there involved figuring out how to manage the thundering herd. It turned out that as long as we had one parent leading and one riding drag, we were OK, but man, it was like herding cats. I swear, five kids can go in fourteen different directions at once. Bonnie stopped and had Phoebs’ hair braided, which is terribly cute on a five year old but not so much on an overweight middle-aged woman, so I restrained myself.

It lasted for the rest of the trip too, but I betcha Bonnie’s got it undone by now, since some of the older girls on the ship were complaining about their hair falling out in chunks after they took theirs out.

Next stop; Puerta Vallarta