I’ve made such odd choices in men lately (what choices I’ve made–there haven’t been a lot) that I metaphorically threw up my hands a few weeks ago and decided to just let bear camp pick my next one. Of course, I didn’t tell them that, so it’s been a remarkably stress-free few weeks.

They could hardly choose worse than I’ve been doing, and their population is more aligned with my tastes than say, the general internet. They’re a good bunch of people who like me and like doing what I do, and scoping out their single friends isn’t really a bad idea. I might even mention it to them one day.

I value competence above about all else, and I hate to be the dominant or more competent one in a relationship. It doesn’t really matter what he’s good at; I like a man who’s better than I am at things that I like to do. As I get better and better at these things, that narrows my potential dating pool even smaller; we have to take out the big majority that are married, and there’s a not-insignificant minority of the single ones who like their women to be much more feminine than I am, and then we start narrowing it down to the usual characteristics. Is he the right age? Am I? Is he not creepy? Decent looking? Fun to be around? All of those things select me right out of the dating pool.

There’s been a cute and obviously single guy rolling with us for the last month or so, from another camp that we run with. He’s nice, and he can definitely out-man me, which is a very important trait to me. He’s a good hunter, and his family is nice too. Thing is, I think he’s significantly younger than I am, and that usually doesn’t float my boat. So I’m trying to squash that crush, as it’s really sort of undignified to be chasing after a younger man, especially if it turns out not to be reciprocated. He’s good to be around though, so it’s only a mental squashing on my part. And I’m failing at the squashing part anyway.

(Photo deleted for his [and my] privacy)

His camp left this weekend (they stay up there for the whole of deer season) and brought down their firewood to our camp, which was nice. Having people come visiting reminds me of camping as a child, with that whole camaraderie thing going that really makes hunting the fun social sport that it is. He showed me some pictures of his previous deer, no major flirting that I could see. But as soon as they got back in their truck, no less than three of my boys pounced on me at once. 

“You know he’s single, don’t you?”

“He’s nice, what about him?”

That sort of thing. Coming from people who don’t know that they’re supposed to be match-making for me and aren’t really the type to set people up anyway. That’s more of a woman’s hobby than a man’s. Sort of makes me wish I’d been a fly on the wall in the truck he’d been hunting in that day.

Dennis backed me up, as I’d mentioned the guy to him before I narrowed down the age. Dennis knows that I’m aware, and I was a little embarrassed to be ambushed while he was still in camp, with his truck window down. I just pointed out that he was a little young for me and besides, he already had my phone number. I’m not stupid, after all! I gave it to him earlier in the season because he was going to talk to a taxidermist friend of his, but I had made sure that he still had it. His father tried to find one of his cards to give to me too–this might be a two-pronged attack.

I missed a golden opportunity to actually point out to the guys that yes, I would like to be set up, if not with him, then with other men of their choosing. It didn’t seem like something I could bring up out of thin air later. But right in front of him? C’mon guys. Ease up a little!

So the ball’s in his court, although I’m not sure that he knows it. It’s easier for me to be bold with a man that’s older than me. I don’t want to have that whole cougar vibe going; I’m not pretty enough for that role anyway, and it strikes me as a little pathetic. I’m just keeping my fingers crossed that he’s a little older than I think. And no, I’m not going to point out which one he is in that photo up there, but he’s one of them. And it’s not going to stay up very long.